flightless hag

A chronicle of the adventures of birdwoman: a lonely, talentless freak who wanders the internet in search of entertainment.

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Location: Philly

I'm a 40-something married white female, survivor of weight watchers, avid reader of pulp. Dogs (not cats), extreme right (handed, not politics), ENTJ, alto, wanna-be knitter.

June 08, 2006

The Further Adventures of Mothman!

Daddy picked me up at school, and there was water coming from the sky on the way home. Bummer. Can’t go outside.

Oh, hey, cars! And trucks! My favorite! I’m going to run them over Dad’s legs. Why does he get so mad when I do that? Hey! Ants! There are ants living in my toybox! Dad will LOVE this, he loves animals! Wait? What’s he doing? Why is he throwing my toybox outside?? WAAAAH!

Oh, here comes Mom! She’s back from wherever she goes! She’ll play with me!

Unless she’s going to read a book. Bummer. But she did say I could go upstairs and play. Like there’s anything cool up in my room. I wonder how many times I can get her to talk to me if I go up the stairs really, really slowly?

Oh, hey! Stinky’s up here, too! Yeah! My brother is cool. Except when he won’t play with me. Like now.

Never mind. I’m going to find new stuff to do today. I’m tired of my toys. What’s on this shelf? My diapers. Balmex. Powder… I like powder! Feels good in my diaper. Maybe it will make my bed feel good! Hey, if I squeeze this, a big cloud happens! Stinky thinks it’s cool too! He’s playing with me! And he looks really funny with white hair.

Oh, man, the powder’s almost all gone. But my room sure smells nice.

Why is Mom screaming? Why is she yelling at me and wiping all the nice powder off of me and off the furniture? She’s so mean. Aack! She’s brought out that machine that sucks things up! Maybe she’s gonna suck ME up! Evil!

Oh, hey, Suppertime! My favorite! Except after ssert, when I have to go to bed. That’s a bummer.

Oh, hey, music! This is my favorite CD! I can sing all the songs way after Mom and Dad even go to try to sleep in their room!

… Stay tuned for further adventures, when the Tood (“I not a baby, I Timmy-Tude!”) has his first encounter with the dentist! Will the moth be drawn to the light? (no, actually, he hated the light til my very smart dentist put sunglasses on him!) Will he fear the dentist’s implements of torture? (no, actually, he really liked the sucky thing!) Will he scream bloody murder as Stinky did? (no, actually, until Mom dropped him off at daycare!)




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