flightless hag

A chronicle of the adventures of birdwoman: a lonely, talentless freak who wanders the internet in search of entertainment.

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Location: Philly

I'm a 40-something married white female, survivor of weight watchers, avid reader of pulp. Dogs (not cats), extreme right (handed, not politics), ENTJ, alto, wanna-be knitter.

May 02, 2005

Would Local Zoning Committees Go Bananas?

So, the Hag family was making its way back home yesterday after another weekend away. This time, it was up to see my relatives in the wilds of North Eastern PA. The journey is a tedious one, mostly following the northeast extension of the Pennsylvania Turnpike. Gads, that road is boring.

One thing we’ve noticed over the years is the steady progression south of the preachy billboards. You know, the religious billboards (“Jesus Comes As Lightning…” – side note here: my brother, whose house was struck by lightning twice within a week or so, must have some beef with the Almighty. At the very least, the big JC owes him a TV and a VCR.) or the sanctimonious billboards (“Perseverence” with a picture of Michele Kwan on it… yukk) that don’t sell anything, just try to cause “deep thoughts” among drivers on the turnpike.


To counter this annoying trend, we were discussing the boards the Rogers clan would put up if we had tons of money and nothing better to do with it. I’d love to do some like those fake-o business motivation posters from
Despair, Inc: “ADVERSITY: That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable”.

John came up with a good one of his own after seeing the latest in a line of “hotline” billboards. “Considering Suicide? Go ahead! Nobody ever said life’s for everybody! (brought to you by the negative population growth committee.)”

Anybody want to sponsor us?



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