Fundamentals of Personal Hell

So, I’m a manager now. Dilbert principle come to life, I suppose. But one of the tortures one must endure at Spaceleys when one is in management is absolutely torturous training. This week’s winner? Fundamentals of Personnel Law.

So, we’re sitting in this room, camera conferenced in with the other rooms across Spaceley’s enterprise. Some lawyer from Texas tried to enliven a three hour meeting discussing just what was legal and what wasn’t when it comes to employer-dom.

For example, did you know that requiring a high-school diploma, just because it seems a good idea, is illegal? You have to prove the job needs it. If you just want to require it because you think only losers don’t finish high school, well, you’re discriminating. Illegally. Because it ends up that like 70+% of dropouts are minorities.

Some of the other gems? Can’t ask about an arrest record for the same reason. Can’t ask an exempt employee to check his email or voice mail on PTO days, because even 15 minutes of work = a full day. Can’t call someone over-qualified, because the EEOC has decided that means ageism.

I was getting so torqued. I mean, if an employer decides they don’t want to have female managers, well, that’s kinda stupid, and jerky, but not illegal. Or it shouldn’t be. If a company is publicly owned or privately held (not a govt enterprise, in other words), the only punishable offense should be defrauding people of money. Discrimination may be assinine, in some cases (but in some cases, being discriminate is a good thing!), but there should be no law against it!!

My only enjoyment the entire time was picturing Ogre having to go through the same class. He would’ve blown a gasket.

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